Category Archives: Things



Whenever I find an ant in the sugar it makes me think of Scarface. I bet this ant (Anty Montana? Tony Montanta?) is having the time of its life at the moment, but it will soon become paranoid and alienate all its friends. This can only end in tears. And violence.

Salt scrub

Salt scrub in jar

Last winter, I bought some salt body scrub at the West End markets. My skin is a big sook and doesn’t cope with dry weather (or cold, hot, or wet weather for that matter – I’m not quite sure what environment I’m really built for, but I suspect it’s indoors), but the scrub made it feel great. When it ran out, I bought a fancy beauty spa version of it from Mecca Cosmetica and I was also given a L’Occitane version for my birthday. Both of these were were really good too.

This year I was worried I wouldn’t have any (like, actually worried about this in the way someone might worry about something important), because of my limited finances. But after a bit of a look around the internets, I found a few recipes. I didn’t exactly follow any of them, but I did learn that the key (well, only) ingredients of salt scrub are salt and oil, and decided I could probably manage making it myself. When I did, I felt equal parts impressed with my resourcefulness and embarrassed that I’d bought it in the first place.

Salt scrub

Jar – I’ve found that one with a plastic lid or one of those latch-type lids is best
Fine salt – not the iodised stuff
Grapeseed oil – apparently you can also use almond oil, which I decided would be too expensive, or olive oil, but this can be a bit ‘oily’, whatever that means…
Essential oil – you can use whatever takes your fancy – I recommend rosemary

Combine the oil and salt and add a few drops of the essential oil. To avoid making too much of a mess, I suggest filling the jar about two thirds full of salt and then adding a bit of oil at a time and mixing with a knife until combined. You can then add more salt if it looks a bit oily. When it’s finished, it will form a kind of clumpy mixture, like this:

Salt scrub

Stir through a few drops of the essential oil, and that’s it.

To use it, rub about half a teaspoon of the scrub all over dry hands for about 10 seconds. Wash it off with warm water and dry your hands thoroughly. They should feel moisturised but not oily. You can also use it on your arms and legs, but be careful about how oily the floor gets when you do this. And it makes a nice gift. I mean, who wouldn’t be stoked to be given a Vegemite jar full of salt and oil?

Fettuccine wound

fettucini wound

Have you ever cut yourself with pasta? I have. It wasn’t cooked pasta, which I hope makes it marginally less silly. I’m cooking pasta for dinner tonight. Perhaps I should wear safety gloves…

Potato henge

Potato henge

This is what normal people do when they’re making potato and leek soup.